Well it’s been over a year since your divorce and you’re feeling the pressure to start dating. The anxiety is so overwhelming, you wonder if you’re really ready to throw yourself to the wolves. What do you say, what should you wear, how do you even get started? And then it happens.

You find someone or someone finds you attractive. You begin the awkward journey toward a relationship. The initial conversations some how yank you out of the abyss called divorce. You feel alive again, sixteen again, and ready for love again. But are you truly ready to date again?

Let’s just take the guesswork out of it, shall we. If you think you can handle the truth, examine the following 10 points:

1. You still celebrate birthdays, valentines day, mothers day,
   etc...... with your ex-husband
2. No one else in his family knows that your divorced
3. You talk to your ex on the phone daily
4. During your first date you spend hours talking about your ex
5. The two of you still show up at family gatherings together
6. You still cook, clean and wash clothes for your ex
7. Your ex has keys to your place and you have keys to theirs
8. You still go on family vacations together
9. You tell your date that you and your ex still have "relations" from
   time to time
10. You tell your date that your ex would like to meet them

For some of you these scenarios may sound bizarre. But for those of you who are wondering which one of your best friends spilled the beans? I have three words for you; You’re not Ready!

By Michelle McAllister, Writer, The Church Online